“How do I put my baby down?” is a question that comes up frequently in the search terms that readers are looking for on this blog.

It doesn’t surprise me. That a baby wants to be held pretty much all of the time comes as a big shock to the majority of new mothers. The image we internalize from many media is that of a baby sleeping sweetly in a crib in a prettily decorated nursery or of one lying on a blanket gurgling happily. When a baby appears in a TV drama, for instance, it’s usually carried around in a carseat. The woman acting as new mother then features in a number of scenes in the show minus her baby bundle, apparently unencumbered by her infant’s immediate needs.

Even mothers who expect to spend a large amount of time with their newborns are nevertheless unprepared for just how absorbing…